May the Flames Unite Your Families As You Are United
The Unity Candle Ceremony
For about 50 years in the U.S., couples in some church and secular wedding services have incorporated a unity candle ceremony. The roots of this ceremony are unclear, but may have borrowed from various African tribal traditions. One such tradition lights the couple's first hearth with fire from the hearths of the bride's and groom's families. In another tradition, a torch is handed from the bride's father to the groom, who in turn lights a ceremonial bonfire in the center of the village.
Some religious denominations have accepted this custom but others have not. This ceremony is usually recommended as part of an indoor wedding service as the flames can easily be blown out by wind.
The unity "candle" is actually a set of 2 tapers and a larger central candle placed on the altar.
Usually, one taper is lit by the bride's mother. The other taper is lit by the groom's mother. The lighting by the mothers is often accompanied by a specially chosen piece of music. The bride and groom each take a taper and light the central candle and as they do so they may exchange words about the uniting of their families. Sometimes, the bride and groom hand their mothers flowers that had been set at the altar. This part also may have its own special soft music. In the past, the taper flames were extinguished to show that the couple is now a union. However, more recently, the tapers may be kept lit to show that the bride and the groom each retain their individuality as well as being united.
A set of these candles may be purchased from various shops and on-line stores that sell wedding accessories. Candles can also be custom made in various shapes and designs, even by the bride and groom themselves! On the right is an example of one of many unity candle sets available at MyWeddingFavors.com. Just click the image to see more or make a purchase.
Note that if you are having a religious ceremony, as with the unity sand ceremony, you should check with your house of worship to see if a unity candle ceremony is allowed.
Read our article on the wedding ceremony and then take a look at other wedding planning articles on this site.
